I shambled through the door of the dentist office and was quickly ushered to the back room for today’s procedure. The staff was friendly and welcoming, as usual.
The plan was to remove the two temporary crowns and glue the permanent crowns to my little skaggers (definition is here if you didn’t start from the beginning of this story), forever encasing them in their tombs.
The hygienist (or nurse, I’m not really sure exactly what her title was) explained that sometimes this can be a little painful but since I hadn’t had any issues, there was probably nothing to worry about.
She started by using some kind of forceps type tool. Like the tool you would use to extract a foal that the mother horse was having trouble birthing. She used the tool to grip the temporary skagger shell. After securing her grip, she wiggled with the strength of 10 horses to pull away the temporary crown.
It is a weird feeling when this shell gets removed. It didn’t hurt but it did feel a little bit sensitive.
It’s kinda like when you have a pet hermit crab and trick him into coming out of his shell to do a trick. Then when he finishes the trick and turns around to go back into his shell, Surprise! I’ve hidden your shell buddy!
I found myself thinking about the temporary crown slipping out of the tool and falling down my throat. Perhaps they could use tethers to control the crown and the tool to prevent this from happening.
She moved onto the next temporary crown and snatched it away as well.
She asked if there was any pain or discomfort.
“Nay,” I replied.
Then she swiped away some of the old glue that remained on the skaggers so the permanent crowns would fit snugly.
That part felt a little weird but nothing terrible.
The next step was to try on my new permanent crowns to check the fit. I think they keep them refrigerated because they felt really cold.
After they were placed, she gave me something to chew on.
“Stop chewing on it. Just bite down so the crowns don’t fall down your throat, fool,” she said (somewhat paraphrased.)
She then put some body armor on me and shot me full of radiation.
Both crowns fit perfectly.
Soon after, the doctor came in and brought out the finest horse-glue that money can buy to forever encase my skaggers within their crowns.
He placed the first one and pushed it into place with the strength of 1000 horses.
Some of the glue seeped out and tasted kinda like acetone. Delicious.
This was repeated with the second crown.
They placed a chunk of cotton in my jaws and told me champ down hard on it for a bit so the crowns could be seated correctly while the glue started to dry.
“Not my finger. Bite the cotton,” she said.
Like I can tell the difference.
We got it right on the second try.
After a minute or two they had me open my mouth and they pulled away the cotton. Some of the glue stuck to it and pulled it apart.
It felt like pieces of hay stuck in my mouth.
The nurse then flossed and scraped away at the excess glue to clean up the crowns.
I felt a few chunks of stray glue that felt like grain in my mouth that I spat out.
That was it.
I went to the receptionist to pony up the money.
We said our goodbyes and I trotted out the door to finish my day.